Living Someone Else’s Version of the Ideal Life?

We have a very interesting conundrum as human beings — how do we live our most authentic life in a way that honors us as an individual and strengthens the collective community as well as our physical environment (aka earth).

Does that sound way too big for one person to manage? Well, that’s because it can feel overwhelming based on how you perceive it through your own beliefs and experiences. And with so many people showing, telling and dictating how you should or could feel, and sharing it all over the Web, how do we really know what’s ours? How do we sort out the path that feels like joy rather than duty to attempt to get somewhere specific based on someone else’s “proven system?”

The one most important thing you absolutely NEED to figure out is how to tap into and listen to your own inner guidance. No program, plan, book, seminar or video series is going to tell you how to do that for yourself. You can use the tools, tips and insights from these things as guidance, sure, but the truth is in the living, in knowing what feels good and what doesn’t in the context of your own personal truth  in the moment.

Perception vs Your Truth

So have you ever taken the time to think about how you approach life? Are you living in the present or always striving towards a destination? Are you jumping into fitting a specific mold laid out by the latest book, video or seminar? Are you filling in the shells of blank worksheets just to get them done, or are you checking in with what feels right as you work through them? Do you tinker with the formulas and tools, looking at how to use them to create a more authentic life that isn’t already scripted out by someone else as the go-to way to do it?

Look, there are tons of tools are out there. There are endless programs that claim to lead you to your “dream life” and new realms of fulfillment you never thought possible. But none of them work in the long run if you don’t do the emotional release work required to move into a new way of being, naturally, and change your perceptions. And that, is a very personal path. The most important question is, do you even know HOW to do feel your own truth?

So maybe it’s time to examine your own perceptions. Where are you jumping on the bandwagon, buying into a tool or program without even understanding why? Where are you fooling yourself or using it to distract from feeling what’s underneath the surface?

Knowing How to Feel into the Answers

When people are stuck in their mental space, they tend to want to think through to the next logical step so they can be “prepared.” The mind wants to figure it out and do it in the safest way possible, and often that means taking the route that avoids the “feeling part.”

Well, if you really want to grow, you need to feel. And that might mean going back and revisiting things from your past that you never fully released or got over. Don’t mistake this for dwelling in old feelings and hurts. It’s about taking an objective perspective on those situations and emotions and looking for certain patterns. One time is an anomaly, lot’s of times means there is a big lesson to be learned for personal growth, and by releasing that pattern or learning behavior, it can bring you to a whole new level of thinking and being.

Be aware that these thought patterns and emotions don’t necessarily clear themselves out overnight. They go in waves, and there are more and more layers that need to be uncovered as you go. It’s all part of the process, and this is where the right tools can really come in handy to keep you clear on what is grounded in the present (in your body), and what is only an emotion is ready to be released.

How people feel is such a unique experience, there is no way for me to possibly tell you something specific that will work for every single person or work consistently. What I can tell you from my personal experience is it’s been so, so important for me to spend time alone, undistracted and willing to deal with what shows up and call on healing help if I need it. For me unexplained pain or illness is often an emotion that needs to be released. And when I feel uneasy or anxious, it’s because it’s my body telling me that someone or something is not a fit, or I’m picking up someone else’s “stuff”. Most importantly, I know what a yes or no feels like in my own body, and I’ve given myself the permission to trust it without pummeling myself with questions why.

By having trust and inner clarity, all the other background noise is just that, noise, and I can move into what’s true for me. Then, the right tools are much more powerful. And when you can operate from a space where you are clear and trust yourself consistently, you are making the biggest and best contribution to your community and physical environment, just by being you. How awesome is that?

So what keeps you on track and tapped into the “real” you?

Photo by garlandcannon on Flickr