Creative Katrina

Photo by garlandcannon on Flickr

We have a very interesting conundrum as human beings  – how do we live our most authentic life in a way that honors us as an individual and strengthens the collective community as well as our physical environment (aka earth).

Does that sound way too big for one person to manage? Well, that’s because it can feel overwhelming based on how you perceive it through your own beliefs and experiences. And with so many people showing, telling and dictating how you should or could feel, and sharing it all over the Web, how do we really know what’s ours? How do we sort out the path that feels like joy rather than duty to attempt to get somewhere specific based on someone else’s “proven system”?

The one most important thing you absolutely NEED to figure out is how to tap into and listen to your own inner guidance. No program, plan, book, seminar or video series is going to tell you how to do that for yourself. You can use the tools, tips and insights from these things as guidance, sure, but the truth is in the living, in knowing what feels good and what doesn’t in the context of your own personal truth – in the moment.

Perception vs Your Truth

So have you ever taken the time to think about how you approach life? Are you living in the present or always striving towards a destination? Are you jumping into fitting a specific mold laid out by the latest book, video or seminar? Are you filling in the shells of blank worksheets just to get them done, or are you checking in with what feels right as you work through them? Do you tinker with the formulas and tools, looking at how to use them to create a more authentic life that isn’t already scripted out by someone else as the go-to way to do it?

Look, there are tons of tools are out there. There are endless programs that claim to lead you to your “dream life” and new realms of fulfillment you never thought possible. But none of them work in the long run if you don’t do the emotional release work required to move into a new way of being, naturally, and change your perceptions. And that, is a very personal path. The most important question is, do you even know HOW to do feel your own truth?

So maybe it’s time to examine your own perceptions. Where are you jumping on the bandwagon, buying into a tool or program without even understanding why? Where are you fooling yourself or using it to distract from feeling what’s underneath the surface?

Knowing How to Feel into the Answers

When people are stuck in their mental space, they tend to want to think through to the next logical step so they can be “prepared”. The mind wants to figure it out and do it in the safest way possible, and often that means taking the route that avoids the “feeling part.”

Well, if you really want to grow, you need to feel. And that might mean going back and revisiting things from your past that you never fully released or got over. Don’t mistake this for dwelling in old feelings and hurts. It’s about taking an objective perspective on those situations and emotions and looking for certain patterns. One time is an anomaly, lot’s of times means there is a big lesson to be learned for personal growth, and by releasing that pattern or learning behavior, it can bring you to a whole new level of thinking and being.

Be aware that these thought patterns and emotions don’t necessarily clear themselves out overnight. They go in waves, and there are more and more layers that need to be uncovered as you go. It’s all part of the process, and this is where the right tools can really come in handy to keep you clear on what is grounded in the present (in your body), and what is only an emotion is ready to be released.

How people feel is such a unique experience, there is no way for me to possibly tell you something specific that will work for every single person or work consistently. What I can tell you from my personal experience is it’s been so, so important for me to spend time alone, undistracted and willing to deal with what shows up and call on healing help if I need it. For me unexplained pain or illness is often an emotion that needs to be released. And when I feel uneasy or anxious, it’s because it’s my body telling me that someone or something is not a fit, or I’m picking up someone else’s “stuff”. Most importantly, I know what a yes or no feels like in my own body, and I’ve given myself the permission to trust it without pummeling myself with questions why.

By having trust and inner clarity, all the other background noise is just that, noise, and I can move into what’s true for me. Then, the right tools are much more powerful. And when you can operate from a space where you are clear and trust yourself consistently, you are making the biggest and best contribution to your community and physical environment, just by being you. How awesome is that?

So what keeps you on track and tapped into the “real” you?

Photo on Flickr by Jaaron

Talking out loud to yourself is not just for movie scripts, when scary things lurk in the shadows and a blonde, scantily clad woman screeches out — “Who’s there?”

It actually serves as a very useful tool in cutting through a steaming pile of mental goo.

Thoughts breed on thoughts, and it’s so easy to get wrapped up in your own web full of them. Most often you aren’t even sure how they got started, but they quickly run over each other, creating an life-size hairball that requires serious mental Drano.

I would like to say meditation is the best solution, but some folks swear to bits they are too antsy, and all prior attempts have been futile and frustrating. Journaling is another option, but it takes quite a bit more time, as you need to write regularly before recognizing mental patterns. And as much as it pains me, some people just don’t like to write. Gasp!

Here is an effective, creative option to help untangle the mental fuzz — talk to yourself, out loud.

Hearing is Believing

I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume most folks have heard their own voice through an audio recording. Whether it’s your cell phone message on playback, the lame yet hilarious answering machine message from back in the day, or through a little video snippet, you’ve had a chance to hear your own voice.

It’s common for people think their own voice sounds weird and foreign to them, but this exercise goes way beyond what you think you hear, and pushes ahead toward how it FEELS to hear it.

When you actually hear yourself externally, stringing together words in an impromptu fashion, you will feel any number of things; relaxed, excited, confused, annoyed, strange — there are oodles of possibilities.

As you continue to talk out loud in a stream of consciousness, after a few minutes you begin to tell which thoughts really sound authentic and are true for you. It generates a different kind of reaction in your gut, and you will feel how some words sit well, while others feel “off.”

This is one way to start picking through the mental trash, and see what needs to go.

Saying words out loud also let’s you FEEL the weight and energy of them in the instantly in the present moment. This is the real objective perspective you need in order to start noticing lack luster thought patterns and try on new “word wheels.”

Clear for Take Off

Talking out loud to yourself may feel odd at first, but it’s a much more direct way for feeling into the vibrational connection between the words you say and how they feel in your body — the epicenter of intuition. As you clear out the mental clutter and make space for new, more divergent, clearer thoughts, negative mental loops start to dissipate.

Free yourself with your own voice. Find time to talk out loud to yourself, and see how to melt away old patterns you might not even realize were inhibiting your greatness.

Photo by dprevite on Flickr

Just as so many others have declared before this post, I’m going to affirm yet again that we live in a busy world that is face-paced and dense with information overload. And yes, I’m well aware that I’m stating the obvious.

But as the world continues to whiz on by and change at hyper-speed, we form habits to deal with all the “noise.” Some of us need a routine to help keep us on track, others just become complacent in the barrage of input, and choose to hollow out a niche where we feel comfortable. Although it feels safe, it can also keep us from challenging ourselves and growing personally and professionally.

When you really think about it, what is the difference between showing up in a consistent way, and becoming complacent by ALWAYS showing up in the same way? Hmmm…

Bring it to the Mat, Baby

I took a new yoga class this week (yay for me!), and I was inspired by the instructor’s perspective on consistency. It turned out to be a fast-paced, more aerobic-type yoga class, and she needed to school us class newbies on one thing – to be consistent in our breath and effort. She guided us to show up for every pose with the same energy, persistence and determination, whether it was our favorite pose or something we felt was simply impossible to manage. As we flung our arms and legs about with an increasing intensity in the second half of class, she continued to bring us back to that same simple point – are you ready and willing to show up with the same care and intensity for the next pose?

The instructor’s simple insight reminded me of how people often forget the act of consistency in their daily lives. By doing your best to show up in a strong, positive way even when things are hardest, is what builds character and inspires growth in all areas of life.

The only difference is that in yoga it’s only you and the mat – so there IS no where else to go but within and show up for yourself. It strips away the ability to point the finger or make excuses, or distract yourself from showing up truthfully, facades stripped away.
 
When Comfy Equals Consistency

Now on the flip side, there are many people who get into a consistent routine and let it take over for months on end. This set way of doing things does not inspire them to grow and they cling to the routine to feel good, as fear of change creeps in along the sides of their life. Soon they do nothing but focus on the routine, because changing the game at this point feels too risky. If this all sounds familiar, it may mean you’ve entered the “comfy trap.”

When things feel too safe and predictable, it may be time to reevaluate. Are you really happy? Is there something missing from your life that could make you happier? Are you just afraid to rock the boat and try something new? It happens to us all – we get in a rut for any number of reasons. We make excuses to ourselves and for ourselves as to why action is not right at this time, but being aware is the first step to shifting it.

Now don’t confuse being comfy or stuck with creating a routine. A routine is a helpful tool to keep you on track and make sure there are important core, self-care things in your life to keep you grounded and feeling mentally clear. Routines are also good for things you NEED to do, but don’t particularly enjoy, because it provides a way for you to mentally commit to getting them done with consistency.

At the end of the day, you are only really accountable for yourself and to yourself. Unless, of course, you have children. In that case you need to feed and water them – oh wait…that’s plants! But you get the idea.

You can’t fight the inevitable, and change is really the only constant you can count on. Show up to your own “yoga mat” ready to take on what you can, confident you are willing to give all aspects of your life the same energy, space and awareness.

Photo credit: Robot Monster on Flickr

At the source of every challenge lies one simple question…how do you feel? Not what do you THINK, but how does a current situation/person/thing make you feel?

It might seem like an over simplification, but let’s take a second to break it down.

Feeling the Truth

When you are unsure about how you feel, there is a sense of disconnectedness that makes you uneasy, frustrated and confused. This disconnectedness, even at a very minor level, can skew your perception of things, making you doubt yourself or even worse, over think everything.

However, when you are really clear on how you feel about something, then you are in touch with the truth of the matter – without getting caught up in the drama of the mind. Next steps become clearer. You are more confident about the next move, instead of carrying around a scrambled mix of thoughts and emotions that are nebulous and hard to decipher. In fact, you may quickly discover there may be nothing to do at all – other than changing your perception.

This is what happens to many people; the mixing of thoughts and emotions without a sense of which is which. It’s happens most often when a new problem or challenge comes up, and the old ways of dealing with it no longer work. Unsure of how to move through it, it’s easy to  become emotionally stuck or feel blocked and feel like you are trying to balance in quicksand.

Opening up the Possibilities of Clarity

So you know you’re blocked…what do you do? Consider setting aside regular time for meditation, as well as explore a variety of energy healing modalities (i.e. Reiki, acupuncture, yoga, tai chi, aromatherapy and many more!), to find one that resonates. In fact, try a few. These non-invasive techniques help to open up your mind and release outdated patterns of thinking to help you get a clear sense of how you truly feel in the present day.

Another option is good old fashioned self exploration. Here are a few questions to get you started…

• Is this what I really want? If not, what is?
• Am I happy now? (not will I be in the future)
• Is there anything in my power to change or do differently that could possibly impact how I feel right now?

These questions may be simple, but it doesn’t mean they will be easy to answer. However, they all lead you to the same key thing…tapping into how you truly feel.

If you are too afraid to dig in deep and ask the questions you fear the answers to, then you can’t grow, and you have nothing to work with. Your uneasiness prevails, and anger and resentment builds up. Over time, this can lead to physical complications and dis-ease caused by emotional blocks that are compounding. Most importantly, you will continue to feel unhappy and unfulfilled.

Clarity is empowering. It doesn’t necessarily stop the pain you may be feeling, but helps you find ways to embrace and finally move past it. When your perspective shifts to see the same challenge in a new way, you begin to move towards a state of empowerment, and life begins to show you some really amazing, happiness-inducing possibilities.

Photo by origamindon

We all get stuck. Usually you have an inkling about what’s buggin’ you, but distract yourself into thinking you don’t. Other times the “what” just keeps slipping out of your hands like a snake covered in baby oil. It slithers into the background out of sight, but you feel its presence, lurking in the shadows.

Thoughts about the “what” keep you on edge because you don’t know when its finally going to peek out, tongue flickering, to make the big reveal. No way to prepare. And even though there is no reason to be scared, you are because it’s the UNKNOWN. Human beings are most afraid of what they don’t know. That’s what makes it so easy to get stuck in a rut. It’s safer.

A Method to the Madness

This week I wrote a poem. The first one in over three years. It’s called “Cracked”. As a teenager, poems were like a close friend no human could match. I would take my cactus of emotions; rough, confusing and prickly and pour them out into jagged prose. Poems were the fastest way to directly capture my feelings rather than explaining around them in a narrative. They could show up raw, real and exposed.

The page magically filled with words that were unique and meant something special to me; a direct line of communication to the inner depths of myself. I didn’t realize how much I missed it; the words alive with passion, clarity and truth. Succinct yet immensely freeing. Going back to that familiar playground this week felt so, so right.

Is there something you used to do when you were younger to vent, to get to the raw depths of your emotions and let them free? Run around the house and scream? Break something? Throw a tantrum? Is it something you can still do today? Are you willing?

The snake may bite. Then again, it might not. But if you don’t open up you can’t let go, either.